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Do you watch basketball housewives? Or some sort of reality TV show like this? I’ll be honest. I don’t. Never have (seriously) and probably never will. I mention it because I think, when I tell someone my husband is an athlete, they imagine whatever lifestyle they see on television. So, if you’re new to this whole basketball wife thing or want to hear a real perspective, read on. Either way, here’s some truth in light of distorted reality.
What you don’t know about athlete wives
Your husband will work 7 days a week/ and almost 365 days a year
My husband loves to remind everyone that we are all athletes. We all have the responsibility of taking the best care of our bodies. But tell that to the overworked mama or the busy entrepreneur. Nobody has time for THAT! I agree we all should do our best to eat as healthy as we can and get at least an hour of physical activity in a day. But, this isn’t the reality for athletes. They don’t have the privilege to take vacations and be still. Their work, career, livelihood depends on the very condition of their bodies.
You’ll move a lot
Like a lot, a lot! Haha. This varies for every family obviously, but suffice it to say, you CAN adjust well and love traveling.
You won’t be able to attend most celebrations
(or you’ll travel a heck of a lot more in attempts to stay connected. which is totally remarkable & admirable btw) You’ll find yourself moving quite far from wherever you call home. If you live overseas, you might experience severe homesickness. You may find it really difficult to attend every wedding, birthday, baby shower and other engagements. Don’t fret. It does get easier over time. Try and prioritize things from the beginning. You’ll make tough, tough choices, but I promise you, it’ll be okay.
Don’t spend holidays with family
If you’re like most other people on the planet, you celebrate some big holiday! And THIS may be one of the toughest situations to work through. Do you travel back to visit family? If so, whose family? Yours? Hubby’s? Traveling during national/worldwide holidays will be one of the busiest, most expensive endeavors you embark on. I don’t say this to dissuade you or scare you. I just don’t want you thinking this is all simple and sweet. It isn’t. But it absolutely CAN be done with diligent planning!
Brace yourself if you haven’t already. Your hubs doesn’t have a typical 9-5 like the average joe. There will be several practices in a day, long hours, and many many nights away. (away games, travel, etc.)
Depression can come easily
Protect your mind and sanity. Consistently surround yourself with anything that lifts your spirits and gives you all the positive feels. Depression or just a heightened amount of sadness may rear its ugly face because you’ll find yourself spending a lot of time alone. If you’re an introvert like yours truly, then this may or may not be such a bad thing. So, prepare yourself and make commitments to yourself right now. Decide how you’ll be intentional about relationships and connections. How you will spend your days. What you’ll do if you feel yourself falling into the black dog.
Be proud and support your husband, win or lose
I know this kind of goes without saying. But I mention it anyway. YOU are such an important source of energy. Remember to try and be a positive and powerful one. Like the mama from my big fat Greek wedding: the man may be the ‘head’ but woman, she’s the ‘neck’ and turns the head whichever way she wants it to go. You’re the backbone of your home. That’s a privilege and a huge responsibility, but don’t let that overwhelm you. You are strong. & If you find yourself in a place where you aren’t happy with being a basketball wife or the wife of an athlete in general…I wrote this for you.
Athlete wives are like a sorority, a sisterhood
We get each other! It’s kind of like that moment when you become a mom, and you all of a sudden are in with the cool kids. You begin and understand one another. This is like that. Wives of athletes just know. We get it.